Resentful because he’s making a demand on me I can’t fulfill (I can’t quickly fix things up); he’s using up my precious time; he’s making a messy situation. Then I felt angry because I think I shouldn’t be resentful when someone is sick. Then I resign myself and my emotions shut down altogether. But in the middle of this I pause long enough to look inside myself, I find that these negative feelings seem to be going on, on the surface and that deeper within me are more positive, loving feelings.
He passed away peacefully on June 3rd, 2006 at 86.
Looking back I am glad that I’ve told him how much I love him when he’s alive, when he still remembers me as his daughter, apple to his eyes. I guess that’s why I didn’t cried much when he passed away, neither regret nor anger were inside me, only love.
1 comment:
I am so glad that you are at peace with youself, in respect to your relationship with your Dad. Iguess both of us have similar thoughts and action in this matter. I alwiz tell people to let go...death is imminent. Let them go in peace, and we'll all be at peace too! ^_^
Thanks for this wonderful reminder.^_^
+Ant+
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